​Why I don’t consider myself as a backpacker anymore

Sharing some of my thoughts with my english-speaking friends❤

People that I’ve met along the road always ask me “so you are a backpacker right?”. My answer used to be “yes”, but now I have doubts.  Everyone are looking for different things in life, in their journey. These things might be maybe wanting to know if you can survive without the money, some are looking for endless parties and loads of alcohol, maybe some like the little talks and not digging into the deep and be in the isolation, I dont know. But I know what I want and I’m doing things that most of the backpackers are not doing- I’m just not floating in the moment anymore, I really have a vision.

 I don’t complain about working in a 13-hours shift in a mentally and physically draining job nor I spend time sitting the whole year at the same place and complaining in the facebook how boring Australia is and how pointless “travelling” can be. I know why I’m on the open road, it has a purpose. I don’t want to put myself into the box named backpacker. I’m not the traveller as well. I’m not a local. I’m a mix of everything I guess. I’m not really interested about sleeping in those noisy dorm rooms, I aprecciate silence more. I don’t care when people are looking at me differently just because I don’t drink. I’m taking care of my hygiene and not using the excuse  “I’m a poor backpacker and I don’t even swim to keep myself clean.” I don’t like to skip amazing opportunities just because I’m always hoping and waiting for someone to come and give me money/help me/offer me something. It’s perfectly okay to ask for help but some kind of independecy should remain. Like if you really don’t have anyone to help you, you’ll know that you manage to get through things by yourself as well. Money is just a tool, it’s not a bad or evil thing. if we use this wisely, we could experience, gain and give wonderful things. I love deep connections with humans, places and everything. Australia is offering me so much but we have to realize that it’s not all about taking- it’s about giving as well. Do we leave people/places behind us better as they were? Did we left something good behind? It could be anything, smile, good word, little or big help, good work, positive energy, something thaklt makes you worth remembering for? People come and go and we will cross the paths with people and sooner or later we have to leave them, especially when we’re on the open road. It’s up to us to decide what we’ll leave behind. No one wants to be that “bad one” deep inside.
What I’ve experienced- we represent our nationality. It takes one stupid estonian to ruin country’s reputation for one or more people. They will ask “where are you from?” and after your response they are making assumptions for you just because back in the past they knew one bad worker/backpacker who was estonian and sometimes they assume that you all are the same. It’s their right to keep that opinion but always do your best to show that we all aren’t the same. It takes only one bad worker from specific nationality and this employer doesn’t even bother to take one another person from this nation ever again. There are exceptions of course but always do and show your best.

Don’t get me wrong- I’m not against backpackers. I just don’t fit into that box anymore. When people ask me that backpacker question again, I’m just gonna make that clever fox face and introduce myself properly, without labelling myself anymore. 

I’m having so great time here with all of the up’s and downs. Nothing is permanent and I love it. Scars will heal, people come and go, you have to leave magical places, same as you have to leave the places you don’t like at all. It’s going to nourish our souls if we let them do that, there’s no point of crying back the past or wishing for the same thing happening twice. For the second time the magic wouldn’t be the same anymore. that’s life, no need to force it – life happens, you want it or not. 

 I spent one month roadtripping and I always had people around me. Then I started working- again, people everywhere. And I always wished I could just be alone. Everything was okay actually, but I needed so much silence back then. And now when I had a flight down to South for like 800km’s to another site, all alone – I still have people around me but for the first time I feel like I belong here. Like in this excact moment I wouldn’t be anywhere else. Life starts where the comfort zone ends.

Nonii, alustasin oma rännakut üksi. Pakkumine teisele saidile minna tuli väga ootamatult, vürtsi lisas veel see, et järgmiseks päevaks oleksin pidanud juba kohal olema. 800km, autot pole, bussi- ega rongiliiklust pole- bookisin siis lennu. Pakkisin oma paar kodinat kokku ja 17.novembril viskas ülemus mu lennujaama ja oligi tsaupakaa. Kohale jõudis see mulle vist alles Brisbane’is, et Emeraldi etapp on seljataga. Ligikaudu kuu aega kikerherneste, rekkajuhtide, saididraamade ning kohati 40-kraadiste päevadega. Ma ei saa öelda, et mulle midagi ei meeldinud, väga õpetlik aeg oli. Sain aru, kuidas siin töömaastikul asjad enamvähem käivad, suhtlemisel kadus suurem blokk ära ning muutusi vaimsel tasandil ei hakka mainimagi.

Uus sait on nii tore- ma ei väsi imestamast, kui abivalmid on inimesed. Juba kolmandal tööpäeval sain küllakutseid farmerite peredelt, pakkumisi autole naaberfarmist kui mul on vaja poes käia, rääkimata sellest kui palju mind baari õlut kutsuti jooma. Piirkonna mänedzer kandis ja kannab suurt hoolt selle eest, et mulle siin päriselt ka meeldiks, et mu töötingimused oleksid head ja et mul ikka padi pea all oleks. Ma ei saanud lennuki peale oma sleeping geari kaasa võtta, tahtsin uued asjad osta kuid mul konkreetselt ei lastud seda teha, kaks inimest andsid mulle 2 tekki, mis neil kasutuna seisid, rääkimata pottidest-pannidest. Elukohaga ma olen väga rahul, sõltumata ühisköògist ja -vannitoast. 

Enne tööle asumist kuulsin muudkui, et mul kõrvaltoas Eesti poiss, kes sööb muudkui porgandeid ja et meist saavad kindlasti head sõbrad 😀 mõlemad väited osutusid tõeks, kuigi eesti keelt ta ei räägi. Vene rahvusest ning ka täistaimetoitlane. Soovisin pikalt oma ellu like-minded inimesi ja tundub, et neid hakkab juba tulema. Kõrvaltuppa kolis ka Saksa poiss, kõik me kolmekesi üksi rändajad. 

minu elu esimene külmkapp full of veggies

 Alex tõi mulle töö juurde vegan pitsat- mul oli 13tunnine tööpäev seljataga ja somehow ta teadis, et mul on kõht päris tühi.

Ja minu samplestandikaaslane Joe jagas mulle orgaanilisi köögivilju. Nii armas, ma olen nii tänulik.

Mulle meeldib mu töö endiselt väga palju, nüüd ehk isegi rohkem. Alumine truck on 70 aastat vana ja siiamaani toob meile graini sisse. Juhil endal kodus ega autos mingisugust elektrit pole, väga ägeda energiaga mees.

Ja sample’i kõrval raudteel põristasid sellised mehikesed oma vintage raudteeautodega. Mõtlesin et no mis mul kaotada on ja hakkasin ühe juhiga rääkima, viskasin nalja, et tahaks paar kiiremat ringi teha. Mu sõnu võeti tõsiselt ning hetk hiljem oli nende ülemusega kokku lepitud, et saan nendega sõitma minna. Tegemist siis mingisuguse ajaloohuviliste/vintage sõidukite klubiga. Sain oma site managerilt nõusoleku ning oma lõunapausi veetsin entusiastidega ringisõites- uskumatult tore oli, vaevalt mul elus sellist pakkumist enam avaneb. Hiljem kirjutati mulle, et olin suur hitt sel päeval, et muidu tüdrukuid absoluutselt nende tegevus ei huvita ☺
All of the love,

J

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